When you enter into an event that is social, business, family, religious, or otherwise do you come with an agenda of your own? Do you have expectations that tend to suit your own wants and desires? If you have a pattern of doing this do you often find yourself to be in a power struggle or feel disappointed. If so, you may have a pattern of entering into situations without realistic expectations. Perhaps Susan’s story will help you understand how this works. Susan was invited to attend a seminar in which she was asked to give a three minute talk on one the subject presented at the seminar. Susan was delighted and took pride in the fact that she had some expertise that she could share. Susan thought this would be a good opportunity to market her business. After all, she thought, the seminar is about how to be successful in business and I’m a successful business woman. So when Susan arrived she came with a hand full of fliers that she had specially made up that advertised a special event she wanted to hold. Upon arrival Susan was disappointed to learn that no one was allowed to bring fliers for marketing their own business. Susan then asked if she could pass out her business card. She was told “No. This is not a networking seminar.” So Susan found herself not only disappointed but in a power struggle that limited her pleasure at the event. Had she checked beforehand she could have avoided this disappointment and power struggle and had a more satisfying experience. Hidden agendas and unrealistic expectations can be avoided by taking a realistic look at what you are walking into. Accept and enjoy.