All of us need to be comforted. Life is often difficult and we need a safe to retreat to nurture our hearts, minds, and bodies. My pup, Willie, has his “babies.” When he wants some comfort he will find one of them and place it in just the right position so he can rest his head comfortably.
What do you do when you need comforting? Most of us need a little “comfort space” every day….a place to retreat, have fun, zone out, feel safe. It’s when we don’t recognize that we need comforting that things can go awry. If you don’t recognize the need then you may unconsciously seek comforting in self-defeating ways.
Here are some examples: Over indulgent in a mind altering substance (medication, drugs, alcohol, sleeping pills, etc.); eating ice cream with crushed cookies; withdrawing from responsibilities, picking a fight with your significant other to get some time alone; nonsense shopping; pornography; video or computer games; urgent texting.
Do any of these thing sound familiar? If so maybe there is an alternative you would consider? How about a date with yourself to sit quietly and just feel your feelings after a long shower. Or perhaps make a really tasty and healthy dinner and eat outside while you listen to the breeze. Or perhaps call a friend and just do small talk. Would you consider meditating for 15 minutes? What do you think would comfort you in a healthy way….”healthy comforting?” Find something that connects you with yourself and you can’t go wrong. Maybe be like Willie and just zone for a bit on your favorite “baby.”
Wendy Hill, Ph.D. is a hypnotherapist and psychotherapist in Encinitas, California. Dr. Wendy sees clients in person and counsels on the telephone. Of course, Willie joins in the session.