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Could The Pursuit Of Happiness Be A Form Of Self-Sabotage? By R.D. Cooper

Could pursuing happiness make you unhappy? If so, that seems counter to what seems logical doesn’t it? An entire industry has grown in support of the quest for happiness. We routinely try to support ourselves with positive affirmations and self-improvement education to boost our ability for happiness and success. As in everything in life, there is a tipping point that can reveal where “counter-productive” resides. According to recent research, half of the population is at greater risk if too much emphasis and pressure is placed upon many of the behaviors that we typically associate with desirable in reaching a goal. This article will provide some tips on putting balance into the happiness equation, and remind all that understanding oneself is important, and can be facilitated in hypnotherapy. All actions begin with a thought, so healthy thoughts are vital if we desire healthy outcomes.

In the United States people rank happiness as their most important goal. In a “Psychology Today” article by Laurie Helgoe, Ph.D., regarding the happiness goal she states, “That view has a special impact on introverts. Happiness is not always their top priority; they don’t need external rewards to keep their brains in high gear. In fact, the pursuit of happiness may represent another personality-culture clash for them.” That “personality-culture clash hypothesis” was offered by psychologists Catherine Caldwell-Harris and Ayse Aycicegi regarding “orientations inconsistent with societal values” as a poor mental health risk factor.

In the U.S. it might be easy to think there were far more extroverts than introverts since so much bias toward the latter comes through media reinforcement emphasizing outgoing, talkative, visual, “immediacy vs. reflective” personalities. The message is “that is what is important” and perceptions of competence end up being based upon verbal proficiency. Introverts like to think before responding, and may prefer to prepare after acquiring facts to support their position. And researchers have found that if an introvert attempts to “act extroverted” they suffer more, as reaction times on cognitive testing became slower.

It’s often possible to identify an introvert by their conversational style. They would be the ones doing the listening. Don’t confuse introversion with shyness. The introvert just prefers small or even one-on-one interaction, but has no problem with the ability to be social. The important lesson here for the half of the population who are introverts is, “Be OK with being yourself”. The extended lesson would be the same for extroverts, and for both, understand each other so you can work together and accomplish more in a compatible manner that generates less stress, more success, and greater happiness.

Tips for Happiness:

Give yourself permission to be human and to be you. If you’ve been dealing with a challenging situation that interrupts your ability to be happy, and you’ve “worked on it” and haven’t been able to “change course”, perhaps it’s time for you to call a hypnotherapist. Conduct an interview and find out what they would do to help you resolve your dilemma. In many cases, identifying subconscious conflict is the only way a person ever is able to affect positive lasting change.

Find ways to engage in activities that provide personal meaning, significance, and enjoyment.

Remember what matters most. Happiness depends on our state of mind, not the balance of our bank account.

Don’t forget the “mind-body connection”. If our mind program offers our body a healthy wisdom that becomes our actions that support a healthy physical body, we’ll be happier. Diet, exercise, rest, and noble effort promote happiness.

Be grateful. Really be aware of the wondrous nature of your existence. See all that you are encountering in the present moment for which to be grateful. Just follow your activities from the time you awaken throughout the day, or visualize the same in a moment of meditation, to see clearly just how much there is for which to be thankful.

Happiness begins with healthy “mind-thoughts” and a self-acceptance that calls upon your best personal traits with which to serve others. Unhealthy mind-chatter can be reprogrammed by discovering the root cause of the negative matter that robs you of your life-force and potential. A competent hypnotherapist can help you uncover conflict, and substitute new healthy behaviors for those which no longer serve your best interests. Your ego will survive and thrive with newly integrated actions that promote wellness. Do you need some changes in your life? Keep doing what you’ve done and nothing will change. Need help? Initial therapist consultations are often free.

To learn more about well being, happiness, and hypnotherapy go to www.wendyhill.com.


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