Cal was addicted to porn. It was a secret…at least for a while until his wife discovered the massive amount of porn sites on Cal’s laptop. The discovery almost ended the marriage. Both Cal and his wife were devout Mormons and porn was out of the question for a life of religious integrity. With this realization came the phone call to me. When Cal and his wife arrived at my office it was clear that there was a serious tension between them. The saving grace was that Cal admitted openly that he had an addiction to porn. His wife took it personally and said that if she had been a better lover, wife, friend that this might not be happening. Perhaps true. But I wanted to know the underlying cause for Cal’s addiction. As I took his history I saw that Cal had a difficult childhood. Not as bad as some, but all childhoods had an element of difficulty. Cal was no different. His father was over demanding and tended to ignore Cal’s successes. Cal grew up thinking he was not worthy and lacked the ability to do anything well. At fifteen when he discovered how easy it was to get porn on the computer, Cal was hooked. Porn offered a diversion, a way out of his emotional pain. The more he felt inadequate the more porn helped him feel better. The key to Cal’s problem was not to treat the porn but to treat the underlying cause of the porn addiction. Cal needed help in raising his self esteem and realizing that he was adequate and worthy. With the help of counseling and hypnotherapy Cal was able to get off the porn and live life in a more direct and responsible way.
To learn more about addiction of all kinds go to wendyhill.com.