For most people divorce can be a devastating event sometimes made worse by an angry, irresponsible, or aggressive spouse. The quality of divorce is determined by the emotional and spiritual maturity of the people having the divorce. If you are going through a tough divorce consider that now is one of those opportunities in life to grow emotionally and spiritually. Sit down with yourself and ask yourself how you contribute to the difficulties in the divorce. Do you insist on being a victim? Are you the aggressor? Do you bury yourself in self pity? Are you so afraid of your spouse that you refuse to take a stand? Do you feel so guilty that you give yourself away? Do you use your children to punish your spouse? Are you over greedy? Do I want to punish my spouse? Are you filled with blame, loathing, or hate? When you are asking yourself these kind of questions be truthful with yourself. Find and correct your faulty contribution to the problem. Remember that your peace of mind is at risk. Would you rather be right or happy? The more responsibility you take for your contribution to the problems in your relationship the more happiness you will have. You likely have much more power to create a friendly divorce than you think. Explore the possibilities.