Here in San Diego near Encinitas years ago my husband came home from a book fair holding a book entitled, Thank God For My Cancer. As a therapist I knew that the writer of the book had experienced something extraordinary that had changed her for the better. Recently a client came to me with her own cancer story. It reminded me of the book my husband had brought home years ago. She told me this story: My husband and I have been together for nineteen years. We have two children. I thought we had a good marriage. Yes, there were ups and downs. That’s to be expected. But it wasn’t until I got diagnosed with cancer that I realized that what we had was nothing compared to what we have now. My cancer united us. I hear that the stress of a cancer diagnosis can separate some couples, but my diagnosis brought us together. It wasn’t just that we as a family were in crisis, although that was true. It was that we were so desperate for an answer that we did something we had never done before. Well, if you had asked me before my cancer I would have told you that we had certainly done it…many times. But looking back we really hadn’t. After my diagnosis I was petrified and so was my husband. At first our fear did separate us. We couldn’t talk about it and we for sure couldn’t talk about death. But gradually we began to talk and that’s when we decided to do what we did. I mean really do. We prayed. Now, neither of us is particularly religious. Before the cancer we would have said that we were spiritual but not religious. In fact, I would say that’s still true. But now it’s in a more real way. A way that has not only connected each of us with our own True Spirit but with each other’s. Thank God for cancer.
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