The Renaissance Experience Workshops

With the help of Dr. Wendy, special hypnosis, and hypnotherapy you will identify and transform your self-defeating core beliefs into beliefs that support healthy adult experience. Anxiety, depression, overwhelm, broken relationships, stress, addiction, poor communication, over reaction, and other self-defeating behaviors can be things of the past.

With specific hypnosis strategies you will identify the high impact moments in your past that have continued to adversely influenced you in the present. You will meet and connect with the child within you that has remained secret and has dictated to you throughout your life. You will learn to communicate with your inner child using a special form of self-hypnosis.

Through special hypnosis and hypnotherapy, communication and nurturing of your inner child you can transform how you think, feel, and act. You can open the door for deeper spiritual connection that will sustain you through your life.

You will accelerate your personal growth in the company of a small group of people who are committed to doing the same. The workshops are transformative, compassionate, fascinating, and in moments blissful and thrilling.

The group experience is unique in that it can accomplish what one-on-one counseling cannot. You will be moved by the love and courage of your fellow participants. This will inspire you to take emotional and spiritual risks that will propel you forward in your personal growth. This energy of love and commitment has healing power.

You will experience the support and energy a group of committed people can give to one another. Any initial fears about being in a group with others who are new to you will likely leave you within the first hours of the workshop. You will stretch yourself while doing processes that help transform self-defeating core beliefs into healthy core beliefs. During and after the workshop you will feel the deep satisfaction of watching your life and relationships become more enlivened, more meaningful, and more the way you want.

The Miracle of Worthy and the Secret Gift of Despair

The 80’s was a time of despair for Ryan. He opened the door to my office and quietly sat in the waiting room. His face was drawn and his eyes projected a profound sadness. By his demeanor I could tell that Ryan was a was used to wealth and success. After our greeting we went back to my consulting room where he slowly reached into his pocket and withdrew a gold coin.  Palm open he presented to me.

“I can’t afford a therapist but I have this gold coin. It’s very valuable. Worth about a thousand dollars. It is a coin my wife gave me. It means a lot to me because it was her good luck gift to me on our wedding day. I don’t want to part with it but it’s all I have to give to you. Will you take it in trade for your help?”

I was surprised. Clearly this is or was a man of means. How can he not afford therapy?

“I will pay you in full when I can. Please take it. Please help me. I know you can.”

I have learned over the years that this kind of arrangement isn’t a good idea. But I have strong intuition. Something told me to trust this man.

“I will help you. However I will keep this coin and return it to you when you are able to pay for the work I will do for you.”

Ryan’s face softened and the grief and anxiety changed to hope. I knew I was doing the right thing.

Ryan was forty eight years old and an oilman. In fact, he had made millions in his career in the oil industry. But today he was broke. His wife and the love of his life, Katherine, had left and divorced him. She had stuck with Ryan through two bankruptcies. He told me that bankruptcy was a common occurrence in the oil business. But this was his third bankruptcy and Katherine decided she could not endure another. She was done.

“When I watched her walk out the door I felt as though the floor was dropping out from under me. My stomach twisted and I felt a big hole in my chest. I still feel that way every day. It’s been six months. I can hardly function.”

Ryan was left bereft. His grief at losing her was more than he could endure. He became paralyzed with feelings of hopelessness. He wanted to work and find a way back into the oil business but he couldn’t see a way. It felt like his life was over.

“Everything I did I did for her. She was my reason for getting up in the morning. When she was happy I was happy. Without her I feel empty. Like I’m nothing. I have nothing to fight for anymore. I just sit in my condo. I can barely afford the rent and food. Last week I thought about ending my life. That’s when I called you.”

When someone has this degree of hopelessness and despair I know I have a good chance of helping them, especially if they are the kind of person who is willing to fight for themselves. Ryan had already shown his willingness to overcome difficult challenges by surviving two bankruptcies. Despair is a highly motivating force and can lead us to unknown and unexpected joy and success. I knew I could help Ryan. We began working as a team. Ryan and me against the despair. We had to win.

By the time I met Ryan I had been in practice for ten years. The Renaissance Experience Workshop was something that I had been presenting for only about a year at that point. But that was long enough for me to see remarkable results. There was an opening for another participant in the upcoming workshop so I asked Ryan if he would be willing to enroll in it. He said he would.

Ryan grew up in a small town in the midwest. His father was a wealthy successful businessman who was held in high esteem by his peers. People thought Gus, Ryan’s father, was the best.

“I loved my dad. Everybody loved my dad. People would come up to me and say, ‘You’re so lucky to have him as your dad.’ Little did they know what it was like at home. He was not he same man people saw. Sometimes I felt like there was no way to please him. I really wanted to please him but I felt like I could never be good enough.”

Ryan’s mother, Judy, was smart and creative. She enjoyed her role as Gus’ wife. She wanted to be the perfect wife, mother, and socialite.

“Mom was a good mom. I know she did her best. But she was really into what other people thought about her. We had to look like the perfect family. I had to look like the perfect son.”

Ryan was the first born and the favorite. His sister, Julie, was two years younger. Julie was the family rebel, the black sheep. By the time she was fifteen she had succeeded in embarrassing Judy and Gus many times with her acting out.

“Julie would sneak out at night and meet her friends. She’d get into a lot of trouble that way with drugs and stuff. I remember mom crying and dad fuming. They would ground her but it didn’t do any good. I felt sorry for them having to deal with her.”

Julie was doing the only thing she knew to try to keep her sense of individual worthiness. Ryan felt his mother and father’s sadness, anger, and embarrassment. He didn’t want his parents to suffer any more because of what he might do. He would continue being the golden child who always did good. Without realizing it Ryan inwardly vowed not to make waves. Ryan was unconsciously giving up his own sense of self. His own feeling of worthiness.

“Dad wanted me to succeed in my life. He taught me how to invest and negotiate. Money was not a problem for Dad. If he needed more money he always knew how to find it. I learned from the master. It felt great to be able to use those skills in my business.”

I said, “Tell me more about your parents.”

“Actually Mom and Dad were a team. Whatever one said or did the other supported. I remember being at the dinner table. Mom would say ‘Ryan, don’t put your elbows on the table. Sit up. No woman is going to want a loser.’ And Dad would say, ‘Your mother is right. Losers are not worth the time of day. You want to always present yourself as the best.’ I believed him. Their love and concern for my well-being and future made me feel worthy. I was worthy of their love. I knew everything they said and did were because they loved me.”

I said, “You told me that your dad was a different man than the one others saw. What did you mean by that?”

“Well, here’s an example. Sometimes after dinner Dad and I would go to the basement to work on the train set I got for Christmas. I know he meant well but Dad always had to do it his way. If I wanted to put something in one place he always had another place to put it. Sometimes he would actually move my hand and do something himself. I think he was impatient.”

Ryan knew that in order to get his father’s approval he needed to think like his father and get it right father’s way or he would be seen as a loser. When his father would take over or be impatient Ryan would hide his feelings of frustration and shame at not feeling good enough. Mistakes were unthinkable and must be hidden or corrected immediately. By the time Ryan was eight years old Ryan’s worthiness rested in the impossible  goal of perfection. By the time he was sixteen Ryan felt for any woman to love him he had to look really good and make no mistakes. Keep his elbows off the table. Make lots of money. Be held in high esteem by all.

“The moment I met Katherine I knew she was the one for me. She was beautiful and smart. Just being with her made me feel like I was someone. She made me feel whole. When we married I promised her that I would give her everything. Like I said, she was my world, the wind beneath my wings. In the first two bankruptcies she supported me even though I could tell she was disappointed. She made me feel like I was really someone. I failed her. I didn’t live up to my promise. Now she’s gone. I feel like I’m no one and worthy of no one.”

Without realizing it Ryan had lost a basic belief in himself by the time he was eight years old when his father had moved his hand while playing with the train set. Not worthy to make mistakes. Not worthy to express his feelings. Not worthy to say, “I want to do it my way.” Not worthy to stand alone.

Ryan participated in The Renaissance Experience Workshop with all the commitment and fever of a man determined to slay the dragon of despair. I was proud and impressed with him. I often have great respect for my clients who show courage in facing their dragons.

When the workshop ended Ryan said, “I can’t believe it! For the first time in my life I feel truly worthy. I never realized that I didn’t feel worthy. In fact, it never occurred to me that might be what was making me feel such despair. I had denied so many things about my past. I realize that I am worthy even without Katherine. I know I may never have her in my life again but I can go on without her. I can have a life of success and of joy. I know I can.”

In the workshop Ryan had received the miracle of feeling truly worthy. He felt it in every cell of his body and it filled his heart with unspeakable joy.

Allowing yourself to acknowledge something you have unconsciously denied is like lifting a huge weight from your shoulders and removing debilitating blinds from your eyes. Ryan’s energy was restored and he was now able to see positive possibilities. I was to learn later what he did that allowed his business to thrive once again.

Several months later I received a check and a floral arrangement almost as tall as I am. It was from Ryan. The note said simply, “Thank you.”

I called Ryan to thank him and asked him how he was. He said, “I couldn’t believe it. After the workshop I contacted my attorney. Together we found money I had not realized I had. I began to take action and do things I had neglected to do after Katherine left me. They are things I never would have thought of doing before the workshop. I am back in the oil business. My friends and family can’t believe the change they see in me. You can keep the coin if you want. It’s meaning has changed.”

I sent Ryan his gold coin. It had new meaning now.

The Secret Gift of Despair

From the ashes of your despair arise the phoenix of your Truth and Joy.

This is a phrase I borrowed and honed from the myth of the phoenix rising from the ashes. I say it often in my workshops because very simply it’s true.

It is a real thing that if you face the dragon that is robbing your peace of mind, the dragon will die and you will experience joy. In the many years I have worked as a one-on-one therapist and have conducted classes and workshops I have witnessed this to be true hundreds of times. I have seen people who have despaired of ever having a moment of peace or love face that deadly dragon of despair and rise up. I have seen faces filled with genuine joy. For some it may be the first time in their lives they recognize and feel that kind of love and freedom. What a joy it is to watch. That, by the way, is why I do what I do.

For some it takes real courage to believe in this gift of despair. It requires a willingness to have hope. Like Ryan you need to believe that your despair was created to teach you to thrive.

The Miracle of Worthiness

If you ask them most people will tell you that they feel worthy. But few people realize the unconscious limits they have placed on themselves. To feel completely worthy is a blissful experience. Knowing your worthiness in your mind, body, and spirit is profoundly empowering. It gives you the awareness of your unlimited nature. I call it the ‘wordless experience” because it feels like you are in some kind of heaven. You experience the joy and power of worthiness in every cell of your body. Your mind is clear and confident. You know on a deep cellular level that no matter what you are worthy. You realize that your mistakes past, present, or future don’t define you. You are worthy No Matter What. This is the miracle of feeling Worthy. You realize that your potential is truly without limit.

Ryan achieved this wonderful state in The Renaissance Experience Workshop. It gave him the clarity and peace of mind to be able to move forward in his personal life and his business.

You: I know I’m worthy. People tell me so. I experience it in my work and at home. So what do you mean when you tell me that I may not really know it?

Dr. Wendy: Of course you know that you are worthy. Your experiences have shown you this about yourself. You would not be reading this if you didn’t already have a degree of worthiness. Ryan would have told you that he knows he is worthy but when it was put to the test when Katherine left him he came to realize that he had certain beliefs about himself deep within his subconscious mind that compromised that feeling of worthiness.

You: So it’s a matter of degree? Or perhaps an illusion of worthiness until we are really put to the test?

Dr. Wendy: That’s a good way of putting it. Even though you may think you are worthy you in truth are far greater in value than you realize. Realizing this is a part of your coming to realize who you really are…something of immeasurable value.

The Power of Living In Truth

Ryan had entered a new possibility for how he could choose to live his life. I call that possibility Living In Truth. Ryan can choose to stayed in touch with the realization that he is truly worthy. This takes practice and I will tell you later how you can Live in Truth as well. First let’s see how Ryan’s Living in Truth effects others.

Without realizing it Ryan had automatically become a teacher. Everyone he encountered from his family, friends, and employees to the person pushing a cart in the grocery store were to be influenced by Ryan’s presence.

Living in Truth means that you love yourself and consequently love others. You possess true integrity. You choose to do the right thing rather than that which immediately serves you or seems the easiest. When doing something of virtue you persevere with determination. You become generous with your resources and your time. You still do good even though you may never be acknowledged for it. You know your true calling and you strive with all that is within you to live that calling. You practice honesty with tact and kindness. You realize your mistakes are for learning and seek to learn all you can from them never shaming yourself for your mistakes. You feel your feelings and let them help you negotiate through life’s ups and downs. You are patient and kind. You love and forgive easily. This is Living in Truth.

By your nature you are a magnet. You draw to you and influence others by what you believe about yourself. Negative beliefs are negatively magnetic and attract negative experiences. Positive beliefs are positively magnetic and attract positive experiences.

You automatically project and radiate who you are. Your beliefs about yourself become the energy you project. Others…people, animals, all living things…feel it and automatically react to it. Others may not realize what is happening to them but something is definitely happening to them as a result of being near you.

This is the Way You Change the World

When you Live in Truth your energy becomes positively magnetic. You are automatically influencing all you encounter in a helpful and productive way. In this secret way you change the world. By Living in Truth you subtly and sometimes not so subtly cause others to aspire to that which is the highest within them. For example, your love reminds them that they are loved. They then are moved a step forward in their journey of discovering their own limitlessness. By changing yourself for the better you have become an automatic teacher. You are changing the world for the better just by being you.

Angie was repeatedly angry at her husband, Pim. For her Pim could never do anything quite right. She continuously complained causing Pim untold misery. He reacted by withdrawing from Angie and was on the brink of having an affair.

When Angie first came to my office she presented herself as Pim’s victim. “No matter what that man is bound to disappoint me. I think he must be doing that on purpose! He’s driving me crazy. I want you to tell me how to change him before I do something I will regret.”

Angie was convinced that she was the victim. Actually neither Angie nor Pim were victims. Both were responsible for their marital unhappiness. Angie through her shaming Pim and Pim for allowing it. My job was not to berate her for her mistaken interpretation of her experience with Pim. I believed I could help Pim by helping Angie. So I saw that my job was to offer Angie the opportunity to see the truth for herself.

On some level Angie knew that she was responsible for her unhappiness. This realization is a prerequisite for growth. So I offered her the opportunity to participate in The Renaissance Experience Workshop. It helps transform her beliefs about herself and consequently how she treated Pim.

“I can’t believe I was so mean to Pim. I realize that he was just doing the best he could. I know he was always wanting to please me and do his best. He wasn’t perfect but I sure made him feel unworthy of my love. I’m not doing that any more. I love Pim and I’m going to be more patient with him.”

Several months later I received a call from Pim. “Dr. Wendy I would like to go through your workshop. Angie isn’t the same woman. Angie used to tell me how to do everything. Now she just lets me do what I do the way I do it. No more lectures. She is not so angry any more and I feel so much better. Can you do that for me? I feel so much better about myself and my marriage but I know I need to do some work on myself, too.”

Angie had changed herself and automatically changed her world. By changing her world she changed Pim who in turn is automatically changing others. And so it goes…exponentially doing good in the world.

Past clients regard this workshop series as profound and life supporting. Dr. Wendy has been able to track the results of participants through the years. Often participants say that their Renaissance Experience marked the beginning of a new life for them. All say that they were touched in loving ways they had never been touched before. For some it is a deep spiritual experience. For others it is an awakening to their own worthiness and to the possibility of living their dreams. You can make it what you want it to be.